How to Forgive, Forget and Let Go
① Forgiving someone does not mean releasing them from an earlier guilt. What if the person who wronged you is not living? What if the person is someone who made you extremely embarrassed during school 20 or 30 years ago? Letting go of emotional pain does not mean that nothing happened; it means that you no longer want to be controlled by it.
② Recognize that forgiveness is not denial. Whatever caused the pain was a real incident. Denying that it happened means it is too painful to work through the emotions. There is no timeline on forgiveness. Some steps take longer to get through, and it is acceptable to set them aside for a period of time. Part of forgiveness is understanding whether or not someone takes responsibility for what happened, and may even show regret.
③ Understand, that not everyone who forgives reconciles with the person who caused the pain. There are relationships that are harmful and even physically dangerous. While it is possible to forgive the past and move beyond it, it may also mean that the person who was involved can no longer play an active role in your life. If a person or situation is not safe, it may be best not to reconcile the relationship now. Work on forgiveness at a time when you are emotionally healthy and physically safe.
④ Make a conscious decision to forgive someone. Even if they never apologize for what happened, determine within yourself that it is fine to proceed without this apology. Apologies should not be asking for forgiveness. Apologies should be offered as an effort of true regret. They should be admitting that taking personal responsibility for the situation is important. Even without that apology, make up your mind to forgive, forget, and eventually let go.
1. You may forgive someone _____.
2. There is no fixed time _____.
3. Even if you've forgiven someone, _____.
4. Don't rush to forgive those _____.
5. Some people apologize merely _____.
6. If you expect an apology, _____.
问题1选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
问题2选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
问题3选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
问题4选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
问题5选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
问题6选项
A.you may not become friends
B.to offer forgiveness
C.who are still dangerous to you
D.who wronged you long time ago
E.you may never get rid of emotional pain
F.who only forgive those showing regret
G.for being forgiven
第1题:D
第2题:B
第3题:A
第4题:C
第5题:G
第6题:E
第1题:
【文章大意】如何原谅、忘记和放手
① 原谅某人并不意味着将他们从早先的罪孽中解脱出来。如果那个冤枉你的人没有活着怎么办?如果这个人是 20 或 30 年前在学校里让你很尴尬的人怎么办?放下情绪上的痛苦并不意味着什么都没有发生;这意味着你不再想被它控制。
② 认识到宽恕不是否认。不管是什么造成了痛苦,都是真实的事件。否认它的发生意味着太痛苦无法克服情绪。宽恕没有时间表。有些步骤需要更长的时间才能完成,将它们搁置一段时间是可以接受的。宽恕的一部分是了解某人是否对所发生的事情负责,甚至可能表现出懊悔。
③ 要明白并不是每个宽恕的人都会与造成痛苦的人和解。有些关系是有害的,甚至是身体上的危险。虽然可以原谅过去并告别它,但这也可能意味着参与其中的人不能再在你的生活中发挥积极作用。如果一个人或情况不安全,现在最好不要调和关系。在你情绪健康、身体安全的时候宽恕。
④ 有意识做出决定原谅某人。即使他们从不为所发生的事情道歉,也要在自己内心确定没有这种道歉就可以继续前行。道歉不应该是请求原谅。道歉应该作为真正后悔后的努力。他们应该承认对这种情况承担个人责任很重要。即使没有道歉,也要下定决心原谅、忘记并最终放手。
【选项释义】
A.你们也许不能成为朋友
B.去选择宽恕
C.仍然对你有危险的人
D.很久之前冤枉过你
E.你也许不会摆脱情绪伤痛
F.仅仅只原谅那些表演出来的后悔
G.为了被原谅
【答案】D
【原文考查】事实细节题
【题目释义】你也许会原谅____。
【解题思路】根据第一段"understand what if the person who wronged you is not living?"可知,你可以原谅曾经冤枉过你的人。故本题选D。
第2题:
【答案】B
【原文考查】事实细节题
【题目释义】____没有固定时间。
【解题思路】根据第二段第四句"there is no timeline for forgiveness"可知,原谅他人没有固定的时间。故本题选B。
第3题:
【答案】A
【原文考查】事实细节题
【题目释义】即使你原谅了某人,____。
【解题思路】根据第三段第一句"not everyone who forgives reconciles with the person who caused the pain."可知,要明白并不是每个宽恕的人都会与造成痛苦的人和解。因此选项A.你们也许不会成为朋友符合题意。故本题选A。
第4题:
【答案】C
【原文考查】事实细节题
【题目释义】不要匆忙原谅那些_____。
【解题思路】根据第三段倒数第二句"if a person or situation is not safe, it may be best not to reconcile the relationship now."可知,如果现在情况不够安全,还是先不要和好了。故本题选C。
第5题:
【答案】G
【原文考查】推理判断题
【题目释义】有些道歉仅仅是____。
【解题思路】根据第四段第三句和第四句"Apologies should not be asking for forgiveness. Apologies should be offered as an effort of true regret."可知,道歉不应该只是为了被原谅,应该是真正的懊悔。因此有些人道歉仅仅是为了求得原谅。故本题选G。
第6题:
【答案】E
【原文考查】推理判断题
【题目释义】如果你期待一个道歉,____。
【解题思路】根据最后一句"Even without that apology, make up your mind to forgive, forget, and eventually let go."可知,即使没有道歉,也要下定决心原谅,忘记和放手。可以反推出,如果你一直期待一个道歉,会摆脱不了情绪伤痛。故本题选E。